Monday, July 06, 2009

I never have much liked marriage.
Susie and I got married a bit unwillingly, for her parents' sake. We did our best to make it meaningful, but I wouldn't say it was the happiest day of my life.
the happiness came before.
And after.
Nowadays i feel more cynical about it all than ever. It seems to be yet another device for getting people into debt. Or inducing them to spend money they cannot afford.
A source of anxiety and distress.
A characteristic example of the way our society encourages us to focus on the things that don't matter - the ceremony, the trappings- and neglect the things that really do.
Love. Tolerance. Kindness. A deep sense of regard for one's self and the other...
And yet today when my elder daughter phoned me from Paris to say her man had just proposed to her, and that she had accepted... I found myself profoundly moved.
Weeping with happiness.
Nothing has changed, really: he's the lovely man he always was. She the amazing the young woman she has grown up to be.
I knew they loved each other, and will probably always try to live together.
So why this happiness?
Perhaps, simply because it's a declaration of love.
And we all need so much more of it...


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